Where there are people, there is conflict. Interpersonal conflict could manifest in the “hot” form, such as through heated arguments, or the “cold” form such as ignoring you.
If you’ve ever found yourself in a situation where you couldn’t get someone to talk to you, or even acknowledge you, you’ve experienced the silent treatment.
You may even have given it yourself at some point.
The silent treatment can happen in romantic relationships or any type of relationship, including between parents and children, friends, and co-workers.
One way to understand how to win the silent treatment is to brush it off or ignore it.
If you aren’t necessarily in a close relationship with the person who is giving you the silent, you may be able to just move on and act like nothing happened.
Sometimes that is all that’s needed for them to start talking again, especially when they see you aren’t affected by their attempts to manipulate.
It can be a fleeting reaction to a situation in which one person feels angry, frustrated, or too overwhelmed to deal with a problem. In these cases, once the heat of the moment passes, so does the silence.
The silent treatment can also be part of a broader pattern of control or emotional abuse. When it’s used regularly as a power play, it can make you feel rejected or excluded. This can have a huge effect on your self-esteem.
Know when it’s abusive
Before diving into ways to respond to the silent treatment, it’s important to know how to recognize when it becomes abusive.
Sometimes, going silent may be the best thing to avoid saying things you would later regret. People might also use it in moments where they don’t know how to express themselves or feel overwhelmed.
But some people use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance. If you’re on the receiving end of this kind of treatment, you might feel completely ostracized.
People who use the silent treatment as a means of control want to put you in your place. They’ll give you the cold shoulder for days or weeks on end to achieve those goals. This is emotional abuse.
Disclaimer:The information on this POST is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional advice. The opinions expressed within this article are the personal opinions of the author. All content, including text, graphics, images and information, contained on or available through this article is for general information purposes / educational purposes only, and to ensure discussion or debate.
Thank you...It’s difficult to live that way, so you might be tempted to do everything you can to get back in their good graces, which perpetuates the cycle.
Frequently feeling ostracized can reduce your self-esteem and sense of belonging.
It can leave you feeling like you’re without control. This effect may be more intense when it’s done by someone close to you as a form of punishment.
Know the signs
Here are a few signs that suggest the silent treatment is crossing the line into emotional abuse territory:
It’s a frequent occurrence and is lasting for longer periods.
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It’s coming from a place of punishment, not a need to cool off or regroup.
It only ends when you apologize, plead, or give in to demands.
You’ve changed your behavior to avoid getting the silent treatment.
People who use the silent treatment to win arguments and gain control need to understand the magnitude of their immature behavior.
Confrontation lets them know that you see what they are doing and you understand the tactics they use. After telling them the truth, you can laugh about it.
This shows them that you will not waste your time with such nonsense.
If you’ve ever wondered who uses this tactic, then listen up. There are a few types of people who rely on this response in order to function. It’s virtually impossible for them to respond in a normal manner when faced with opposition. Instead of communicating, they rather refuse to talk in an attempt to get their way.
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The passive aggressive
This type of person seems quiet and non-confrontational. The truth is, they really don’t stand up to confrontation well, and they know this. That’s why they use their passive aggressive demeanor to just clam up.
When something isn’t going their way, they know that their silent treatment may be the only real key to turning the tables and getting exactly what they want, after all.
Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. This all depends on the strength and maturity of their intended target.
The narcissist is a troubled and sad individual. Among their weapons of choice, like their other manipulation techniques, they also utilize the silent treatment. The narcissist, since they are void of all original inner substance, will use the silent treatment to further establish who they are.
Mind you, who they are is just a copy of what you’ve brought to the relationship. The narcissist steals their substance from whoever they can manipulate, and the silent treatment is a covert form of this as well.
Your comments ….
People who haven’t been taught to care effectively for others in a household will use the silent treatment on a regular basis. Selfish people care for themselves over others and when something doesn’t go their way, they ignore others to make a statement.
Usually, selfish people are kind until they start to sacrifice things for others. If they start to make a shift from selfishness to becoming a better overall person, it will be difficult and messy. During this time, it’s good to learn how to win the silent treatment with them in order to help them grow.
Silent treatment behavior is a sign of an extremely immature person. Usually, this type of action is displayed in someone who has had little to no parental teaching. They lack emotional intelligence and usually exhibit this silence as a form of an adult tantrum.
There are many people, who although they are physically an adult, act much like they are a child or preteen. They just don’t have the intellect to communicate as an adult or face confrontation. Thus, they resort to the childish act of ignoring others.
I just don’t understand why we can’t be good, fair, and mature people. I know everyone has different upbringings and past experiences, but when someone tells you that you’re doing something wrong, let’s try to take a look at ourselves instead of living in denial. If we can only communicate and use introspection, we can be the best human beings we can be.
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