Passive-Aggression (2024)

FAQs

Passive-Aggression? ›

Passive-aggressive behavior is when you express negative feelings indirectly instead of openly talking about them. During World War II, when soldiers wouldn't follow officers' orders, experts described them as “passive-aggressive.” A new term back then, but still relevant today.

Sulking, backhanded compliments, procrastination, withdrawal, and refusal to communicate are all passive-aggressive behaviors. When the other person begins acting in such a way, try to keep your anger in check. Instead, point out the other person's feelings in a way that is non-judgmental, yet factual.

Although passive-aggressive behavior can be a feature of various mental health conditions, it isn't considered a distinct mental illness. However, passive-aggressive behavior can interfere with relationships and cause difficulties on the job.

There are many possible causes of passive aggression, such as fear of conflict, difficulty expressing emotions, low self-esteem and a lack of assertiveness. People who tend to be more introverted may also struggle with expressing their needs or wants directly.

A passive-aggressive person is a master of hinting at their feelings without expressing them directly. They may reference an earlier incident without stating their feelings about it or speak about a similar situation and how they feel about that incident instead.

Sarcasm is the most obvious form of passive aggression, and possibly the most hurtful. Your audience may have no idea that you're upset, much less why you're upset. You're just dumping your feelings on them with little context. What to say instead: Examine why you're upset.

The good news is that there is a way to stop this behavior, both in ourselves and in others. The key is to remember this six-word phrase: "Attack the problem, not the person."

Some common forms of passive aggression include avoiding responsibility for tasks, procrastinating and even missing deadlines, withholding critical information, and frequently underachieving relative to what one is capable of producing.

People can be passive-aggressive for many reasons that aren't always intended to manipulate. But chronic (long-term) manipulators will use this tactic to make you feel guilty and give backhanded compliments. They are doing this to show anger without directly being angry, making you feel confused.

Passive-aggressive personality disorder (PAPD) is a condition in which a person does not directly express negative feelings, but instead expresses them indirectly and subtly. Like all personality disorders, PAPD is generally not diagnosed in people under the age of 18.

Do passive-aggressive people know they are? ›

Many people don't realize that they're being passive-aggressive. The behavior may feel “normal” to them. Or they might think it's the best way to avoid hurting someone's feelings or to prevent something bad from happening, like losing their job.

Silence and non-responsiveness are not only passive-aggressive forms of manipulation and attention seeking; they can also be used as tools to promote changes in behavior.

To compensate for one's inability to speak directly and solve problems assertively, a passive-aggressive individual may resort to covert means of manipulation, domination, and control in order to gain leverage. In a twisted way, one feels more powerful by agitating, frustrating, disappointing, and/or failing others.

Limited Awareness. The passive-aggressive is somewhat aware of the fact that she or he is resisting but does not recognize it as passive-aggressiveness per se; they just do what they do. They are not cognizant of, or concerned with, the destructive impact of passive-aggression.

Unprocessed, walled-off, fomenting anger has a way of finding its way to the surface. This is what puts those who grew up with Childhood Emotional Neglect(CEN) at greater risk than others for behaving passive aggressively.

Passive behavior includes violating y our own rights through inaction or by failing to express your thoughts, feelings, or desires. Example: “We can do whatever you want. Your ideas are probably better than mine.” Aggressive Behavior is when someone stands up for their own rights without regard for others.