25 Money Questions You Need to Ask Your Significant Other (2024)

I get it: money is possibly the least sexy thing to talk about. You’d much rather discuss the latest episode of that Netflix show you watch together or the story of how you met. But like it or not, finances are a huge part of life, and therefore, a huge part of a relationship. Money decisions go deeper than just the check dance over who pays the bill at the end of a date.

25 Money Questions You Need to Ask Your Significant Other (1)

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The challenges of money and managing it will come into play even as your relationship starts to become serious, but especially as your relationship develops to the next stages—moving in, marriage, and parenthood are all finance-focused, no matter how unromantic that sounds. So make money something you talk about early on. Furthering your relationship after asking important money questions will avoid potential problems down the road. You don’t want finance to be the thing that makes you fall apart.

So amid ogling over how much you love each other and just howperfect your sig oth is, try asking these important money questions before taking the next step.

1. What are your goals?

2. Where do you see yourself in 10-15 years?

3. What do you like to splurge on?

4. What do you like to save on?

5. If you won the lottery tomorrow, what are the firstthree things you would spend the money on?

25 Money Questions You Need to Ask Your Significant Other (2)

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Ifyou’re getting serious…

It might seem a little forward, and maybe even like an invasion of privacy, but knowing crucial factors of your partner’s finances is important when you’re making commitments to them and building a future together. It will help you determine whether your finances and futures align, and will make more serious conversations like moving in and marriage easier.

6. Do your parents currently pay any of your bills?

7. Do you want more education in the future?

8. How do you like to spend your “fun money”?

9. Do you expect your spouse to work full-time, part-time, or at all?

10. How did your parentstreat their money?

11. What splurge would you never give up?

25 Money Questions You Need to Ask Your Significant Other (3)

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Ifyou’re moving in together…

If you’re going to be sharing a home, you have a right to know the exact ins and outs of your partner’s (and roommate’s) finances. After all, you not only want to know that this is a commitment you both can make, but you also want to establish that you both have similar values when it comes to homemaking and finance. Also, make sure the reason you are moving in together is not financial or just a matter of convenience. It may be tempting to move in when you’re spending every night with them anyway since it would save you half the rent, but remember what a huge life commitment you’re making. Furthermore, making sure you’re not doing it for financial reasons will save you pain (and money!) down the road if you’re not happy but feeling financially stuck in the relationship.

12. Who will be in charge of paying the bills and managing finances?

13. To you, what is worth spending money on, in terms of having a home (rent for great location vs. rent for a big space, groceries, etc.)? What isn’t?

14. What dollar amount, and percent of your income, are you willing to devote to monthly bills?

15. Do you currently owe any money?

16. Do you have any money saved?

17. How much do you want tosave for an emergency?

18.Why are weconsidering moving in together?

25 Money Questions You Need to Ask Your Significant Other (4)

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Ifyou’re getting married…

Not to take away the excitement of the engagement, where everything is rainbows and butterflies, but if you’re getting married, that’s not justa religious and emotional vow ’til death do you part. It’s also a legal binding—one that requires forever defining your finances in relation to the other person’s. Whether or not you decide to financially go by “what’s mine is yours,” your partner’s spending habits will affect your quality of life. Besides just the nitty-gritty details of what to physically do with your bank accounts, ask these questions about “what if” scenarios to avoid problems in the future.

19.How much debt do you have?

20. Do you have a 401k?

21. What is the maxone of uscan spend without having to consult the other?

22. At what age would you like to retire? What are our retirement goals?

23. What happens if we want children but cannot conceive? How much are we willing to spend on fertility treatments or adoption?

24. Would you financially help family if they needed it? How much would you be willing to give?

25. Do we have equal say on how we use our money as a couple (i.e., buying a house, investments, childcare, etc.), no matter who earns more?

25 Money Questions You Need to Ask Your Significant Other (2024)

FAQs

25 Money Questions You Need to Ask Your Significant Other? ›

If your boyfriend is savvy about finances, ask him for advice on a financial issue you're facing, and then segue into requesting a loan. For instance, “I'm trying to figure out the best way to handle this unexpected bill. What do you think? Could I possibly borrow [amount] and pay you back on [specific date]?”

How do I ask my significant other for money? ›

If your boyfriend is savvy about finances, ask him for advice on a financial issue you're facing, and then segue into requesting a loan. For instance, “I'm trying to figure out the best way to handle this unexpected bill. What do you think? Could I possibly borrow [amount] and pay you back on [specific date]?”

What is a serious question to ask your partner? ›

What is your biggest fear or concern about our relationship? What would you like us to do more of in our relationship? What do you think is the key to a happy and healthy relationship? How do you like to be supported when you're going through a tough time?

Should you tell your significant other how much money you have? ›

Talking about money — early and often — is better for your relationship (and just plain better for women). According to research, more couples who talk about money every week say they're happy compared to couples who talk about money less.

When to ask partner how much money they make? ›

If the relationship isn't serious, experts said, it's typically OK to keep the money talk light. But if you're starting to see a real future with your current date, then financial discussions become a necessity — and a crucial part of the foundation of a mature, long-lasting partnership, Bryan-Podvin said.

What are the 36 relationship questions? ›

The 36 Questions
  • Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
  • Would you like to be famous? ...
  • Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? ...
  • What would constitute a "perfect" day for you?
  • When did you last sing to yourself?
May 10, 2024

What are 4 deep questions to ask your partner? ›

Deep Questions for Long-Term Couples

What's your favorite thing about our relationship? What would you like to change about it? What's something new you'd like to try together? When is the closest you've ever felt to me?

What are juicy 21 questions? ›

Best juicy questions for the 21 questions game
  • Where is your favourite place to be kissed?
  • And where is your favourite place to kiss someone?
  • Have you ever sent a nude photograph?
  • Have you ever received a nude photograph from someone else?
  • What attracts you to someone else?
  • What do you wear to bed?
May 16, 2024

Should relationships be 50/50 financially? ›

'It's almost not fair to split finances 50-50'

For example, one partner may be saddled with student loan or credit card debt while the other partner is not. The latter may have the financial strength to carry rental or mortgage expenses so the other person can focus on paying down their liabilities, said Daigle.

How should money be split in a relationship? ›

Split bills by income

Consequently, many opt to split bills proportionally according to each person's income. For example, if Person A makes $6,000 per month, and Person B makes $4,000 per month, their total income is $10,000. Person A earns 60% of that, while Person B brings in 40%.

How do you know if a guy is using you for money? ›

For instance, they may ask you to lend them money or pay their bills. The person imposes on you without consideration for your availability or preferences. For instance, they may move in with you unexpectedly or want to borrow your car at a moment's notice. The person expects you to take care of their needs.

How do I ask a guy how much he earns? ›

You may have to make time to talk about money

Because it's taboo to talk about money, the opportunity to ask someone how much they make won't necessarily come about naturally. You may have to make time. Take your friend to lunch or coffee. Getting out of the office makes everyone more comfortable.

Who should pay more in relationship? ›

It is entirely up to the pair and how they wish to handle money in their relationship. When determining who pays in a partnership, communication is important. Couples must have an open and honest discussion about their financial condition, their desires, and their expectations.

When should you ask for money in a new relationship? ›

How far along in a relationship should I be before I start asking my partner for money? Almost straight away- he should be paying for your dates. Maybe ask him for small amounts at first, like $20–$50, but if he's serious and committed, he should start giving you a lot more than that after a while.

How do you politely ask someone for money? ›

Be transparent: Be open and honest about your financial situation and your need for money. Explain why you need the money and how it will be used. When discussing repayment terms, be specific about the amount of money you need, when you need it, and how you plan to repay it.

How do you ask a loved one for money? ›

When broaching the subject, be prepared, honest and clear. Bring in the number–crunching sheet you've worked out and any other documents you think are relevant. But be open and let them know exactly what you need money for and why your current budget can't cope.

Is it OK to ask money from your BF? ›

If you have just started dating, refrain from asking him for money, unless you are in a serious fix and he is the only one you can ask for financial assistance. Even then, make it clear that you intend to pay him back. If he does lend you the money, make sure you pay it back unless he tells you to keep it.

How do I politely remind my boyfriend for money? ›

It's best to be direct and polite about it: there's no need to bring up the past (unless there's an important reason), just remind them of what they owe. It's never easy to ask someone for money they owe. Remember that your tone can set the mood, so make it warm and understanding rather than annoyed or frustrated!

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