Hands in Pockets: Body Language Decoded (2024)

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Differentiate between confident and submissive body language

Co-authored byElvina Lui, MFTand Eric McClure

Last Updated: August 20, 2024Fact Checked

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  • Meaning
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  • Using Body Language to Display Confidence
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  • Submissive Body Language to Avoid
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Can something as innocuous as putting your hands in your pockets convey something about your confidence or headspace? Believe it or not, it can! Stuffing your hands in your pockets is one of the classic body language signs that someone is nervous or unsure of themselves. However, there are fringe cases where another explanation is more likely. We’ll break down what this gesture means and what you can do to appear more confident and powerful with your own body language.

Things You Should Know

  • Hiding your hands in your pockets makes it seem like you’re anxious, scared, or unconfident.
  • People may also stuff their hands in their pockets if they’re cold or fidgeting with their keys.
  • Try putting your hands on your hips or crossing your arms if you want a gesture that conveys more confidence.

Section 1 of 3:

What it Means if Someone Has Their Hands in Their Pockets

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  1. 1

    In most cases, it signals that someone is nervous, anxious, or uncertain. Stuffing your hands in your pockets conveys meekness, timidness, or anxiety. Someone might do this if they’re actively lying, or if they’re in a situation where they’re overwhelmed, like a job interview or argument. If you want to express strength and confidence, keep your hands out of your pockets.[1]

    • People naturally hide their hands when they’re defensive and want to protect themselves. They also hide their hands if they’re trying to shy away from being seen or called out.
  2. 2

    If it’s cold out, they’re keeping their hands warm. Is it a little frigid out? If so, someone might put their hands in their pockets to keep themselves warm. When you’re cold, your body naturally slows down the blood flow to your hands in order to keep your organs safe, so people naturally try to warm their hands up once the cold becomes noticeable.[2]

    • This is why people will rub their hands together in the cold and blow warm air on them. If you can get your hands warm, your body will increase blood flow.[3]

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  3. 3

    If they’re fidgeting with something, they’re bored or self-soothing. If it’s obvious that someone with their hands in their pockets is messing around with something they’re carrying, it’s possible that they’re just subconsciously keeping their hands busy. This kind of mindless movement doesn’t mean much of anything, although it could be a sign that they’re bored, trying to stay awake, or trying to comfort themselves.[4]

    • People fidget for all kinds of reasons, but the odds are very high that this kind of hands-in-pocket behavior doesn’t mean a whole lot.
  4. 4

    If they’re leaning against a wall, they’re trying to look cool. There’s an old archetype of the mysterious guy or gal leaning up against the wall with their hands in their pockets just being all…broody. Some people will try to emulate this by sticking a hand or two into their pockets.[5]

    • This is especially likely to be the case if they’re sticking their thumbs out of the top of their pockets. It’s definitely the case if they’re also cooly taking drags on a cigarette while leaning against a street pole.
  5. 5

    In some cases, they’re intentionally being disrespectful. In some cultures, putting your hands in your pocket while talking to someone is seen as disrespectful or confrontational. Little children often do this when they’re trying to taunt people while showcasing confidence at the same time.[6]

    • It’s believed that this ties into the same origin as shaking hands. Historically, the handshake was a way of presenting your hand to show that you weren’t holding a weapon. Keeping your hands in your pockets is the opposite of that![7]
  6. 6

    If a woman has her hands in her pockets, she’s enjoying the novelty. There’s nothing more unfair in this world than the pocket discrimination women face. Well, okay, there are a lot of more important inequalities in the world, but it’s true that women’s pants rarely get pockets! If you notice a girl stuffing her hands in her pockets or playing with them, she’s probably just enjoying the fact she gets pockets for once.[8]

    • Of course, she could also be nervous, bored, or fidgety, but putting her hands in her pockets won’t be a natural reaction for most women the way it will be for men who always have access to pockets.
    • Pockets are rare enough in women’s fashion that there’s even a TikTok trend dedicated to celebrating them.
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Section 2 of 3:

Using Body Language to Display Confidence

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  1. 1

    Stand up straight. For most people, putting your hands in your pockets comfortably requires a little bit of slouching. Standing up straight will make you a lot less naturally inclined to put your hands in your pockets, and you’ll look much more sure of yourself.[9]

    • What this conveys: Standing up straight communicates confidence, power, and self-assuredness. It’s a better posture for your back, too![10]
  2. 2

    Put your hands on your hips. If you feel uncomfortable letting your hands dangle at your sides, rest your hands on the top of your hips. This posture is very close to the hands in the pockets move, and it will feel like you’re hiding your hands if you actually are a little nervous, but it sends nearly the same message to others.[11]

    • What this conveys: Known as the arms akimbo position, this stance communicates dominance and power. If you want people to think you’re in charge, this is the stance for you.
  3. 3

    Use your hands to help you talk. Gesturing and calmly moving your hands to the rhythm of your speech not only feels natural for most people, but it helps you build momentum in conversations where you might be a little nervous to get through it. It’s also a great way to keep listeners focused on you if you’re speaking in front of an audience.[12]

    • What this conveys: Hand gestures often express warmth, energy, alertness, and expertise. People will also be statistically more likely to absorb what you’re saying if you use your hands to speak![13]
  4. 4

    Cross your arms. This is a great option if you really want to hide your hands because you’re anxious but you don’t want to appear weak. Cross your arms in front of your chest and tuck your hands in your armpits. You’ll soothe any anxiety you’re feeling—the arms over your heart will comfort any high heart rate, and it’ll feel a little bit like a hug—all while avoiding any signals that you’re nervous.[14]

    • What this conveys: The crossed arms pose indicates you’re calm, confident, and prepared. You often see managers and authority figures use this posture as they assess others.
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Section 3 of 3:

Submissive Body Language to Avoid

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  1. 1

    Slouching Slouching is a sign that you’re not comfortable or prepared. It just generally conveys that you’re kind of tired, too. People naturally slouch when they’re exhausted, so if you want to seem alert, this isn’t a particularly good posture. It also makes you sleepier and more depressed.[15]

  2. 2

    Looking away Averting eye contact is a major sign that you aren’t comfortable. It can send the message that you’re scared if you’re talking to an authority figure, or convey the message that you’re lying if you’re talking to a friend or family member. Always make eye contact if you’re talking to someone and you want to seem sure of yourself.[16]

    • If you’re talking to a group of people, swap back and forth between different members of your audience when it comes to the eye contact. Not only will you appear confident, but you’ll help keep your audience’s attention.
  3. 3

    Leaning away You know how people will shriek and move away abruptly when they come across something gross or scary? That’s a natural, human instinct! People physically shy away from things they want to avoid, and that extends to body language, too. If you tilt away from someone, lean on a wall away from them, or bend at the hips away from someone, it sends the message that you’re scared or trying to get away from them.[17]

    • The opposite is also true. Leaning towards somebody is a sign that you’re interested in them!
  4. 4

    Fiddling Fidgeting or playing around with random nearby objects sends the message that you’re either bored or unsure of yourself. It’s no big deal if you’re fidgeting your way through a boring school presentation, but if you don’t want to come off as distant, don’t squirm or fuss.[18]

    • Some people will interpret this as disrespect if they want you to pay attention to what they’re saying, so be careful about fidgeting during important conversations!
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      About This Article

      Hands in Pockets: Body Language Decoded (34)

      Co-authored by:

      Elvina Lui, MFT

      Marriage & Family Therapist

      This article was co-authored by Elvina Lui, MFT and by wikiHow staff writer, Eric McClure. Elvina Lui is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist specializing in relationship counseling based in the San Francisco Bay Area. Elvina received her Masters in Counseling from Western Seminary in 2007 and trained under the Asian Family Institute in San Francisco and the New Life Community Services in Santa Cruz. She has over 13 years of counseling experience and is trained in the harm reduction model. This article has been viewed 47,657 times.

      8 votes - 87%

      Co-authors: 3

      Updated: August 20, 2024

      Views:47,657

      Categories: Body Language

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      Hands in Pockets: Body Language Decoded (2024)

      FAQs

      Hands in Pockets: Body Language Decoded? ›

      In most cases, it signals that someone is nervous, anxious, or uncertain. Stuffing your hands in your pockets conveys meekness, timidness, or anxiety. Someone might do this if they're actively lying, or if they're in a situation where they're overwhelmed, like a job interview or argument.

      What does hands in pockets mean in body language? ›

      Putting your hands in your pockets indicates insecurity and meekness. Sometimes, of course, this is just an attempt to get more comfortable, but trying to get more comfortable is also something one would do if they were feeling uncomfortable or insecure.

      What does it mean when a man walks with his hands in his pockets? ›

      Hands in Pockets Meaning

      In some cases, it signifies comfort and casualness, suggesting the person is at ease in their environment. However, in formal settings like presentations, it can be interpreted as a sign of nervousness or lack of confidence.

      Why do guys put their hands in pockets after a hug? ›

      Maybe his hands are cold, maybe he's awkward and doesn't know what to do with his hands. It's possible that it's a “Tell”, that he's awkward specifically because he likes the girl, so he's try to keep his composure. But, by itself, it's not much to go on.

      What do hands mean in body language? ›

      Hands open and your palms at a 45-degree angle: Communicates that you are being honest and open. Hands open with palms down: Communicates that you are certain about what you are talking about. Palms facing each other with your fingers together: Communicates that you have expertise about what you are talking about.

      Are hands in pockets rude? ›

      Standing with your hands in your pockets is considered by many cultures to be extremely rude. It looks studiedly over-casual and disrespectful.

      What is the hands in pockets rule? ›

      Navy personnel must present a proud and professional military appearance that will reflect positively on the individual, the Navy and the United States. Sailors are authorized to have hands in their pockets when doing so does not compromise safety nor prohibit the proper rendering of honors and courtesies.

      Why should you not walk with your hands in your pockets? ›

      Keep both hands free for balance.

      Don't put your hands in your pockets or carry loose items. When you put your hands in your pockets while walking, you decrease your center of gravity and throw off your balance. You need your arms for balance!

      What can a man's hands tell you about him? ›

      If they feel icy the first few times you get together, this could be an indication that he feels nervous around you, which can be really sweet. He wants to impress you! However, if his hands are constantly cold, it's likely he has some circulation issues. If his hands are warm, your guy is probably pretty confident!

      Why do guys walk around with their hands down their pants? ›

      "The genital area is sensitive to temperature changes, and men may adjust their hands or genitals to regulate temperature. This could be due to feeling too hot or too cold in that area, which in turn can cause further discomfort," explains Dr Ashrafi.

      Why do guys give girls tight hugs? ›

      A guy might hug you with both arms for lots of reasons, such as to say hello, to cheer you up, or to show you he's interested in you. Note the duration and intensity of the hug: a long, tight embrace may indicate deep, sincere care, while a brief, light hug may suggest only casual affection.

      Do guys like it when you rub their back during a hug? ›

      So, when you and your partner rub each other's back while sharing a hug, you guys are actually trying to convey how much you care for each other. In short, this is the kind of hug you would always want to share with your partner whenever you are sad or feeling low because this hug makes you feel comfortable and secure.

      What does it mean when a guy puts his hands on your hips when hugs you? ›

      It means he's taking liberties and the 'hug' is no longer a hug. Another answer here suggests it is a flirtatious move. However, if you want to let someone know that you are attracted to them, placing your hands on their hips is hardly the way to start out.

      What does confident body language look like? ›

      Practice Proper Posture: Standing or sitting straight with your shoulders back and your head held up, nonverbally reflects your confidence. It doesn't matter how tall you are, when your posture is straight and aligned, instead of shoulders slumped and head down, you will appear in control and confident.

      What is hand kissing body language? ›

      Hand-kissing is a greeting gesture that indicates courtesy, politeness, respect, admiration, affection or even devotion by one person toward another. A hand-kiss is considered a respectful way for a gentleman to greet a lady.

      When a guy clasps his hands? ›

      It may mean that a person using it is about to assume a strong stance, or it may mean confidence or even nervousness. In general, clasping the hands may signify an unsettling thought, respect, fear, anxiety, insecurity, and the like.

      What is the meaning of hands in my pocket? ›

      “Hand in My Pocket” by Alanis Morissette is the Ultimate Positive Gen X Song. It just sums up the feeling of being uncertain, of not knowing how your future will go but being cool with that feeling and being optimistic that you can make the most of it.

      What does the idiom put their hands in their pockets mean? ›

      to give money to someone or to charity (= organizations that collect money to give to poor people, ill people, etc.): People are more inclined to put their hands in their pockets to help children.

      What is a pocket hand? ›

      “Pocket hand” is a way of teaching heeling that emphasizes rear end movement from Day One.

      What does folding hands mean in body language? ›

      Most commonly, it is interpreted as a gesture of defensiveness or being closed. As with all body language, you must consider the context in which the gesture is occurring and the details of the gesture itself. This is a part in a series of articles on “Body Language.”

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