FAQs
People avoid feedback because they hate being criticized, plain and simple. Psychologists have a lot of theories about why people are so sensitive to hearing about their own imperfections. One is that they associate feedback with the critical comments received in their younger years from parents and teachers.
Why does feedback make me uncomfortable? ›
For most people, the word feedback, especially in their work context, tends to trigger all sorts of negative and troubling thoughts and emotions. This is because the way we have often received feedback and the way we give feedback has generally been less than optimal.
What is the fear of disappointing others called? ›
Atelophobia is an obsessive fear of imperfection. Someone with this condition is terrified of making mistakes. They tend to avoid any situation where they feel they won't succeed. Atelophobia can lead to anxiety, depression and low self-esteem.
Why do I have a fear of disappointing others? ›
The fear of disappointing others can also be a sign that you didn't feel accepted for who you were growing up. Perhaps you grew up in spaces where your mistakes were scrutinized. Perhaps you grew up being put down when you tried to be yourself.
Why am I so sensitive to feedback? ›
Why can't some people take criticism well? Taking criticism badly (or feeling like you do) can depend on numerous variables including your current state of mind, your interpersonal dynamic with the person giving criticism, negative past experiences, and your emotional IQ.
Am I cherophobia? ›
Examples of symptoms associated with cherophobia could include: experiencing anxiety at the thought of going to a joyful social gathering, like a party, concert, or other similar event. rejecting opportunities that could lead to positive life changes due to fear that something bad will follow.
Why do I hate giving feedback? ›
We don't want to hurt someone's feelings.
By far, this is the #1 reason we resist giving feedback. Yes, being sensitive to employees' feelings is a good thing, and it's much better than the alternative. Yet all too often, we let regular constructive feedback go, in order to assuage our own feelings about conflict.
Why does feedback hurt me? ›
It turns out that the amygdala plays a big role in our fight or flight response. So, when you feel like punching someone in the face or running out of the office when they give you negative feedback… it's because you're hardwired to feel that way.
Why do people struggle with feedback? ›
We may have a fear of criticism or failure
Others face it constantly. That's natural, but a fear of failure or criticism can make it challenging to receive feedback. While our minds feel as though it is a threat to our safety, it is important to recognize that we are all human and all face critiques from time to time.
What is a Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia? ›
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia refers to the phobia or fear of long words. Feelings of shame or fear of ridicule for mispronouncing long words may cause distress or anxiety. Phobia isn't officially recognized as a diagnosis, so more research is needed.
The fear of being forgotten is called athazagoraphobia. When a person has this condition, there is an extreme fear of being forgotten, or of not remembering someone or something. There are treatment options such as mindfulness techniques, cognitive behavioral therapy, and medication.
How to stop being afraid of disappointment? ›
What are the ways to overcome the fear of disappointing others?
- Self-reflection and awareness. Start by reflecting on the root causes of your fear. ...
- Challenge unrealistic standards. ...
- Establish healthy boundaries. ...
- Practice self-compassion. ...
- Develop effective communication skills. ...
- Accept imperfection.
Why do I feel bad letting people down? ›
It's possible that you were often made to feel guilty when you disappointed others. For example, a well-intentioned parent may have said things to you like, “You made Mommy feel really sad when you did that.” Thus, you may feel guilty quite quickly and easily when you disappoint others.
Why am I so afraid of upsetting others? ›
Nurture self-confidence — The fear of upsetting others often goes hand in hand with insecurity. Concerned that your relationship isn't strong enough to handle conflict, you avoid it. Worried that you're not capable enough to overcome an obstacle, you try to circumvent it.
Why do I struggle to give feedback? ›
Fragile egos, miscommunication, and poor timing are just some of the challenges of giving feedback. These challenges can easily stand in the way of giving and receiving feedback that supports employees' growth.
Why does feedback make me feel bad? ›
If you grew up without praise or encouragement, or were criticized harshly, you will feel overly sensitive to feedback. You equate criticism with rejection that feels unendurable.
Why do I get defensive with feedback? ›
When feedback triggers defensiveness, it is often because the feedback brings up feelings of sadness, hurt, shame, anger, or being misunderstood. Defensiveness might present as a response to what you're saying in the moment, but often has very deep roots.
Why does feedback hurt my feelings? ›
Just ask Dr. Martin Paulus, an Adjunct Professor of Psychiatry at the University of California, San Diego. He claims the reasons we respond so poorly to negative feedback is because of the portion of our brain called the amygdala. It turns out that the amygdala plays a big role in our fight or flight response.