5 Ways To Overcome The Shame Of Debt (2024)

Credit card debt is a huge issue in the United States. The average household has $15,675 in credit card debt according to a survey conducted by NerdWallet. Credit card debt holds people back from their financial goals and what they want to accomplish in life. And, there is also a lot of shame associated with having too much credit card debt.

According to surveys of Credit Simple readers, 45% say that they are worried about their debt all the time. Worrying about your debt limits what you can do. It paralyzes people with fear and creates a sense of hopelessness. They don’t know where to turn or what to do next.

But, it doesn’t have to be that way. You can take back control of your finances and ultimately take back control over your life by letting go of the shame of credit card debt.

Getting over the shame is not easy. It takes a lot of work and resilience. But, most importantly, you have to want to end the cycle of debt and get back your life.

How to Overcome the Shame of Debt

Here are five ways that you can overcome the shame of debt and take back control over your life and finances.

Own Up To Your Debt

Like an alcoholic attending an AA meeting, you have to admit that you have a problem. That’s the first step. You have to recognize that you have a problem with debt.

Admit your debt problem to yourself, and then tell one other person about your debts. Telling others about your debts will make it real, and it will lift a burden of keeping it secret. It’s freeing. You’ll be surprised by how many other people are struggling with the same issue as soon as you admit your problem to others.

It’s hard to talk openly about our finances. It’s something that many of us are subconsciously trained to avoid from an early age. Our parents have taught us that we shouldn’t talk about finances, politics, sex, or religion in public.

But, now is the time to get it off of your chest. Find a friend that you can confide in. Or, sit down with your spouse to admit that you have a problem with debt. Admitting that you have a problem is the first step to getting over the shame you feel about your debt.

Understand Why You Continue Adding to Your Debt

Now that you have admitted to having a problem, you need to dig deeper into the shame of your debt. You have to look at why you are continuing to add to your debts.

Are you addicted to spending? Do you spend money as a coping mechanism for some other underlying issue?

Like most things, you have to understand your “why” to get to the heart of the matter. It will get to the root of your spending problem, which will help you ease the burden of shame and then know how to tackle the issue.

Seek Help to Conquer Your Debt

Like most people, you can’t go it alone. You can’t conquer your debt and get over the shame of it by yourself. And, that’s okay.

You should seek help. But, where do you turn? That’s one reason many of us read blogs and look to the internet for help to answer our questions. The internet is a wealth of great resources to help you find education and learn about ways to overcome the same of having debt.

You can also turn to a credit counselor for advice on helping you tackle your debt and get over your shame. A reputable credit counselor can help you learn how to manage your money, help you set up a budget, and offer you more education or workshops on tackling your debt.

Legitimate credit counselors are certified and trained to help you with consumer credit issues, debt reduction, and money management skills. They can help you to look at your entire financial health and situation and also develop a personalized plan to get you on the right track.

You just want to make sure that it’s a legitimate credit counseling. There are many less than reputable firms that can take advantage of you though. You will want to thoroughly research any credit counselor that you chose to do business with before you pay for their services.

A credit counselor may also help you set up a debt management plan. If you establish a debt management plan, you will deposit money each month with the credit counseling organization, who often negotiates lower interest rates and repayment options with your creditors on your behalf. You pay them one monthly payment, and then the credit counseling service pays your creditors for you according to a payment schedule they set up with your creditors.

You should check with your creditors to ensure that they offer and accepted the reduced interest rates and balances that your credit counseling organization told you. You can also contact your creditors yourself to try and reduce your interest rates and balances instead of paying a credit counseling service to represent you.

Stop Spending and Adding to Your Debt

To get over the shame of debt, you have to stop the cycle of spending. Now that you know the reason why you spend money, have talked to people, and admitted you have a problem, you have to stop adding to your debt.

Many people find that they continue to spend money and add to their debt because they are not following a budget. Your family needs to set and follow a written budget each and every month.

You may also find it helpful to cut up your credit cards to stop spending. Others have been successful by freezing their credit cards in a block of ice. You’ll think twice before spending money and adding to your debt if you have to wait hours for a block of ice to melt before you can get to your credit cards.

Make a Plan to Pay Off Your Debt

The last hurdle to getting over the shame of debt is to pay it all off. Using a debt snowball is one of the best ways to pay off your debt. Dave Ramsey made using a debt snowball popular and describes it in detail in his best-selling personal finance book, The Total Money Makeover.

With a debt snowball, you list all of your debts and begin tackling them one by one starting with your smallest amount of debt first. You use all of your disposable income after you tighten your budget to pay off that debt. And, then you roll those payments into the next debt as you pay each one off. This is of course while you pay the minimum required payments on all of your other debt at the same time.

It has a snowball effect on your debt as you increase your payments moving from one debt to the next after paying them off. Unlike other plans, a debt snowball plan has you pay the smallest debts off first instead of the ones with the highest interest rates.

Paying off your smallest debts has a psychological effect. You see a small win, and it quickly builds momentum as you begin to snowball the payments from the previous debts and tackle larger debts with higher interest rates.

You add the amount you were paying on that first debt and roll it into the next debt on your list in addition to the minimum monthly payment you were already making. You’ll then have more money available to pay off each subsequent debt.

You can end the cycle of shame over your debt. But, it will take work to regain control over your finances. The shame of credit card debt doesn’t have to overtake you. You can overcome the shame of debt with these tips slowly but surely.

How have you taken back control over your finances after having a mountain of debt? Did you use the snowball method to pay off your debt? Did you find an accountability partner?

5 Ways To Overcome The Shame Of Debt (2024)

FAQs

5 Ways To Overcome The Shame Of Debt? ›

Face Your Situation Head-on

Sometimes the shame people feel about their financial situation will cause them to avoid it altogether. This will only escalate the situation. Take proactive steps to gain control of your finances by taking stock of how much debt you are in and who you owe.

What are the 5 golden rules for managing debt? ›

Master your money with 5 golden rules of personal finance
  • It's a simple rule, but it's still the most potent piece of money wisdom: don't spend more than you earn. ...
  • Rule 2 – Create an emergency fund.
  • Rule 3 – Pay down debt as a priority. ...
  • Rule 4 – Create money goals. ...
  • Rule 5 – Make your money work for you. ...
  • Recommended reading.
Jun 24, 2024

What are the 5 steps to get out of debt? ›

5 Steps to Getting Rid of Debt
  • Set a goal. All successful projects start with a clear goal. ...
  • Make a list of your current debts. In order to get rid of your debt, you need an accurate and complete list of the debt you have. ...
  • Gather additional information on debt repayment. ...
  • Make a plan. ...
  • Stick with your plan.

How to overcome the shame of debt? ›

Face Your Situation Head-on

Sometimes the shame people feel about their financial situation will cause them to avoid it altogether. This will only escalate the situation. Take proactive steps to gain control of your finances by taking stock of how much debt you are in and who you owe.

What are the 5 C's of debt? ›

This review process is based on a review of five key factors that predict the probability of a borrower defaulting on his debt. Called the five Cs of credit, they include capacity, capital, conditions, character, and collateral.

What are the 3 biggest strategies for paying down debt? ›

Common strategies for paying off debt
  • The debt avalanche method: paying your high-interest debt first. The avalanche method focuses your repayment efforts on high-interest debt. ...
  • The debt snowball method: paying your smallest debts first. ...
  • The consolidation method: combining your debts to help simplify payments.

How to realistically pay off debt? ›

Read on for six tips from experts on the simplest strategies for paying what you owe.
  1. Start With a Budget. ...
  2. Curb Extraneous Spending. ...
  3. Prioritize High-Interest-Rate Debt. ...
  4. Consider a Balance Transfer or Debt Consolidation. ...
  5. Negotiate Interest Rates and Payment Terms. ...
  6. Find Ways to Bring In More Cash.
Jul 10, 2024

What is the step 5 of the debt diet? ›

Step # 5: Develop a Monthly Spending Plan.

Give yourself a budget and stick to it. It should include all housing costs and expenses, transportation and other miscellaneous expenses, and the debt that you owe.

How to overcome money shame? ›

Heal your Money Shame with my 7-step of “Money Detox”
  1. Step 1: Own Your Money Story. ...
  2. Step 2: Recognize Your Spiritual Crisis. ...
  3. Step 3: Uncover Your Shame. ...
  4. Step 4: Identify Your Money Beliefs. ...
  5. Step 5: Discover Your Worth. ...
  6. Step 6: Make Forgiveness a Daily Practice. ...
  7. Step 7: Live From a Circle of Money Blessings.

How do I get myself out of extreme debt? ›

6 ways to get out of debt
  1. Pay more than the minimum payment. Go through your budget and decide how much extra you can put toward your debt. ...
  2. Try the debt snowball. ...
  3. Refinance debt. ...
  4. Commit windfalls to debt. ...
  5. Settle for less than you owe. ...
  6. Re-examine your budget. ...
  7. Debt-to-income ratio. ...
  8. Interest rates.
Dec 6, 2023

How do I forgive myself for debt? ›

How To Forgive Yourself For Financial Mistakes And Move On
  1. Examine what you've learned.
  2. Discover your triggers.
  3. Shift your mindset toward forgiveness and action.
  4. Make a plan.
  5. Give yourself the same compassion you'd give to others.
Apr 6, 2021

What are 5 ways to manage debt? ›

Here are five smart steps that can help you gain greater control of your debt situation.
  • Make More than the Minimum Payment. ...
  • Tackle High-Rate Accounts First. ...
  • Shop for Better Rates. ...
  • Read the Fine Print on a Balance Transfer Card. ...
  • Negotiate.

How to overcome debt trap? ›

To escape a debt trap, focus on budgeting, prioritize debt payments, consider consolidation or negotiation, and avoid accruing more debt through responsible financial management.

What is the first thing to get out of debt? ›

List your debts from highest interest rate to lowest interest rate. Make minimum payments on each debt, except the one with the highest interest rate. Use all extra money to pay off the debt with the highest interest rate. Repeat process after paying off each debt with the highest interest rate.

What is the golden rule of debt? ›

In the golden rule, a budget deficit and an increase in public debt is allowed if and only if the public debt is used to finance public investment.

Which debt to eliminate first? ›

Prioritizing debt by interest rate.

This repayment strategy, sometimes called the avalanche method, prioritizes your debts from the highest interest rate to the lowest. First, you'll pay off your balance with the highest interest rate, followed by your next-highest interest rate and so on.

What is the 20 10 rule tell you about debt? ›

The 20/10 rule follows the logic that no more than 20% of your annual net income should be spent on consumer debt and no more than 10% of your monthly net income should be used to pay debt repayments.

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