Have you ever been friends with someone who is outwardly agreeable but then acts in ways that aren’t so kind? For example, let’s say you suggest going to a concert together and they enthusiastically agree. But when it comes time to buy the tickets they don’t respond to your messages. You go ahead and purchase them since they had initially said yes, but then your pal backs out at the last minute with a feeble excuse. Now you’re stuck with 2 tickets and have to scramble to find someone else to go to the show with you.
Or consider this common office scenario. In a meeting, someone brings up an idea for a new project. Everyone verbally agrees with the plan, but when it comes time to get the project underway, one person procrastinates, doesn’t hit their deadlines, and effectively sabotages the whole thing.
These are examples of passive-aggressive behavior. People who are passive-aggressive don’t express their anger, disagreement, or negative emotions directly, but rather through hostile or mean-spirited actions. These mixed messages leave others feeling confused, and this destructive trait can damage relationships at home, at work, or in love.
People who are passive-aggressive don’t express their anger, disagreement, or negative emotions directly, but rather through hostile or mean-spirited actions. This can damage relationships at home, at work, or in love. Click To TweetWHAT IS PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PERSONALITY DISORDER?
Passive-aggressive personality disorder (PAPD) is not considered an official psychiatric diagnosis, but according to research published in the journal Psychiatry, some mental health experts contend that it should be. Within the field of psychiatry, PAPD has been viewed in a variety of ways, including a personality trait or syndrome, a dynamic behavioral pattern, or a negativistic personality disorder. Regardless of its classification, it is a real issue for many people that gets in the way of healthy relationships in all areas of life.
Outwardly, passive-aggressive people seem pleasant, but internally, they feel frustrated, angry, or negative. They are often insecure, have low self-esteem, or are afraid people won’t like them if they voice disagreement. Research shows that people who are passive-aggressive have an increased risk of the following:
- Anxiety disorders
- Depression
- Borderline personality disorder
- Narcissistic disorder
- Substance abuse
WHAT CAUSES PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOR?
Experts point to both genetic and environmental factors in the development of passive-aggressive personality disorder. A study on twins in the Journal of Personality Disorders suggests that heritability accounts for 50% of a person’s risk for this trait. Several research papers have looked into the environmental factors that contribute to this personality type and concluded that the following increase a person’s risk:
- Ineffective or harsh parenting
- Childhood trauma or abuse
- Neglect
10 SIGNS OF PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE PERSONALITY DISORDER
How can you tell if you or someone you know has passive-aggressive tendencies? Here are 10 common behavior patterns associated with a passive-aggressive personality disorder.
- The silent treatment: Passive-aggressive people may have a hard time discussing their anger or negative emotions, so they stop talking altogether as a form of punishment.
- Negative body language: Rolling the eyes or crossing arms while others are speaking can be indirect signs of disagreement, resentment, or frustration.
- Ghosting: Rather than ending a relationship—whether it’s with a romantic partner or a colleague—in person, the passive-aggressive type is more likely to ghost the other person. They simply refuse to communicate anymore to avoid conflict.
- Making excuses: Individuals who exhibit passive-aggressive behavior are experts at coming up with excuses to get out of doing things.
- Procrastinating: When the passive-aggressive person says yes to something they should have said no to, they will often put it off as long as possible.
- Forgetful: These people tend to forget tasks, assignments, or promises they made that they didn’t want to do in the first place.
- Being sarcastic: Individuals who are passive-aggressive frequently use sarcasm to subtly attack others while claiming they are “just kidding.”
- Blames others: Passive-aggressive types are quick to say that their shortcomings are due to the fault of others.
- Pouts or acts sullen: Saying things are “fine” while conveying a sour mood is a common trait among passive-aggressive people.
- Being a complainer: Whining or complaining about things without taking any positive actions to change things is common in this personality type.
HELP FOR PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOR
People with PAPD can get better. Recognizing the signs associated with this personality trait is one of the first steps. However, be aware that many of the signs listed above are similar to symptoms associated with other mental health issues, such as ADHD, anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, conduct disorder, oppositional defiant disorder, schizophrenia, or substance use disorder. Ruling out these other conditions or identifying co-occurring disorders can be helpful in finding the right treatment.
Solutions for a passive-aggressive personality disorder may include beneficial forms of psychotherapy, training to improve the ability to resolve conflicts directly, increasing self-esteem, overcoming negativity, and addressing any co-existing disorders.
Personality disorders and other mental health issues can’t wait. At Amen Clinics, we’re here for you. We offer in-clinic brain scanning and appointments, as well as mental telehealth, clinical evaluations, and therapy for adults, teens, children, and couples. Find out more by speaking to a specialist today at 888-288-9834 or visit our contact pagehere.
